


Only me

by BubbleCherry



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-18
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2019-04-04 09:32:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14017329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BubbleCherry/pseuds/BubbleCherry
Summary: Have you learned your lesson now, Kyungsoo?





	Only me

Have you learned your lesson now?

 

If I can’t have you, no one else can have you.

 

I love you the most, Kyungsoo.

  
  
  
  
  


Remember the day you confessed to me? When you finally realized that the feelings you have for me were mutual? That was definitely the best day of my life. The best thing that has ever happened to me. You did it, Kyungsoo. You finally overcome your fear of coming out to me and confessing. I’m proud of you. 

  
  


You told me you love me, ever since I approached you. Ever since I rode the train with you, ever since I took you home. You fell in love with my kindness and I fell in love with your beautiful smile that you never showed to others except me. 

 

I made you open up, meet more people, to see if you will give the same affection and attention that you give to me. But, I’m so glad that you didn’t. 

 

I’m a special one, aren’t I?

 

Ofcourse, I am. Because I’m the only one who loves you, truly. 

  
  
  


Kyungsoo, I’m really sorry that I rejected you. I never told you the reason why, because you never even asked me and my heart that was only made for you-shattered when I saw your body tense up and your face turn into the shades of white. I saw the hurt that flashed in your doe eyes, but you lowered your head and hid it with a soft smile.

 

You never asked me why I did, even though it was obvious that I liked you back. I was guessing that you knew the reason why, and I thought we understood each other without having to confirm it with words. Being a celebrity, a singer, an actor, a model, that would all go down the drain when they find out that we’re gay. So I rejected you, to protect your career. No, to protect  _ our _ career. 

  
  


But that wasn’t the case. 

 

You never even thought of that reason, because if you did, you would have still been looking at me with the same eyes you did whenever you want to kiss me, right?

  
  


After my rejection, we acted normal and I was happy with that. There was a little distance, but I ignored it for now, because I know your hurting that we couldn’t be together. That we couldn’t be like one of those couples that flirts all the damn time and says ‘I love you’s’ every second of the day. Don’t worry, I am too. I understand, so take as much time as you need, because I know you still love me and I do too.

  
  


So tell me, Kyungsoo. The time that you haven’t spent with me, did you spend it with someone else?

 

Ever since you took that role in that one drama, you’ve been getting home later than usual. Been eating together with the members and me less often. I barely see your ethereal face or hear your beautiful voice. My messages and calls, they went unheard, ignored and forgotten. I thought it was because you’re busy on your project and wanted to focus on it.

 

But it wasn’t that.

 

A week passed and everyone finally got the chance to see you again. Everyone was happy and excited. Asking you questions about your new movie and how they’ve missed spending time with you. I’m the one who missed you the most though, and I hope you know that without me having to tell you. 

 

Say, you never really liked styling yourself. So what's with the turtlenecks lately? 

 

I couldn’t help but notice the enthusiastic voice you use whenever you talk about your movie, but most of all, I never missed the way your eyes would be filled with love whenever you talk about this one co-worker. Those eyes that were only meant for me, those very eyes that never lied to me and told me everything.

 

I didn’t want to ask you about it directly, mostly because it always slipped my mind whenever you give me light punches on the shoulder when I tease you about your cute and chubby cheeks or the way you pout when you washed your dirty plate.

 

So when I heard your low humming coming from the bathroom in the middle of the night, I finally get to see what you’ve been hiding from me. Through a small crack on the door, I saw you happily humming the tunes of a love song.

 

The way you brushed your hands on those purple marks around your neck like they were the most delicate thing you’ve touched and the way your lips curved up into a smile. That very look and aura that told me that you were in love and happy. That same look that you only showed me, is meant for someone else already.

  
  
  


I’m sorry, Kyungsoo. I know I’ve been saying it too much, to the point where I don’t even know if I mean it or if I don’t, but I’m sorry. 

 

I apologize for going through your texts with him and taking pictures of it. I’m sorry if I looked through your gallery and saw your selcas with him, happily looking at each others eyes and sharing small pecks on the cheeks. I’m sorry that I sent them all to a publisher that will surely post it for the whole world to see. 

 

They saw Kyungsoo. They all did. 

 

They judged, supported, questioned, but most of all, they hated. 

 

Our own members said they didn’t mind, but they still couldn’t hide their disgust. Reporters shoved their mics on your face, camera flashes blinded you more than ever and they threw things at you like you were garbage. 

  
  
  


They hated you and him, together. They hated  _ you _ , Kyungsoo.

  
  
  


But don’t worry, I don’t hate you. 

 

I opened my arms when you came to me, crying. Your whole body was shivering-like a newborn calf-from fear, rejection and loss. I’m sorry that when your whole world was breaking, I smiled. Because I’m here to fix it. I’m all you’ll need and no one else.

 

He broke up with you, Kyungsoo and denied being in love with you. He said it was a forced relationship and you watch him puke out lies on live television. Do you know why he did that? It’s because he never loved you. He used you. He manipulated you. He made you think that true love is you and him, together. He lied to you, but don’t worry Kyungsoo. I’m still here. 

  
  
  


I’m the one who loves you, truly. 

 

You’ve learned your lesson now, right?

 

I’m the only one who can have you. You belong to me, Do Kyungsoo. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Cross-Posted from Asianfanfics.


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